Viewing things through an ironic lens has become the best way to cope when my medical whatever-it-is-thingamabobber-that-still-hasn’t-gotten-resolved pops up. I’ve certainly been the picture of dignity lately. Highlights include having an ass cheek spasm for an hour or so last week (alarming, to say the least, but also so absurd that I had to laugh) and being paralyzed after lunch at work while badly needing to go to the bathroom (it waits for no bladder? Also, by the way, fellow coworkers, I know I haven’t mentioned this before, but don’t be alarmed…I have this thing…).
If my condition had a Twitter account, today it’d be filled with riveting details such as: Managed to migrate self from bed to bathroom. Success! [12pm] and Why am I getting hot flashes? Can’t possibly be close to menopause, but having it as another of many symptoms is just mean [5pm].
It’s just a shame sheer willpower isn’t an adequate fix. But I suppose if I can’t just feel better and be out getting things done, at least I have good material for a neglected blog and potential awkward moments to create with acquaintances who ask, “So how’re you doing?”

